The countdown is on.
Cue the circus music.
Ladies and gentlemen...
Hurry, Hurry, Hurry!
Come one...Come all!
Now appearing at Marburger Farm, Tent H9 for a limited 5 day engagement, October 2-6...
Talking Trash with her one and only Cat Daddy!
As my friend Liz pointed out this past weekend...there's nothin' left in the barn to beat the dirt out of. Everything that can be crammed into that 40 footer is crammed and any part of me that can be covered in dirt is covered!
Y'all...I'm feelin' ugly as an ol' pair of worn out work boots.
Grocery store feet?
I WISH!
Law...the bottoms of my feet are beyond Wally World dirty and I think my nails are permanently stained Special Walnut...or maybe that's Johnson's Paste Wax I'm sportin'. I forget which and at this point...doesn't really matter. Ugly is ugly and my feet and hands are uhh-gly! It's a cryin' shame no one is re-making the movie Deliverance...'cause I'd shore nuff be a shoe-in (if I wore shoes) playing an extra. Hark...do I hear banjo music playing in the soundtrack of my mind?
Grocery store feet?
I WISH!
Law...the bottoms of my feet are beyond Wally World dirty and I think my nails are permanently stained Special Walnut...or maybe that's Johnson's Paste Wax I'm sportin'. I forget which and at this point...doesn't really matter. Ugly is ugly and my feet and hands are uhh-gly! It's a cryin' shame no one is re-making the movie Deliverance...'cause I'd shore nuff be a shoe-in (if I wore shoes) playing an extra. Hark...do I hear banjo music playing in the soundtrack of my mind?
My hair? Oh mylanta...my poor head o' hair is in dire need of a shearing trim. I wonder if Evelyn Chickie Baby RobUhLyn can lop about an inch off with a pair of wire cutters...while she's swingin' from the top of our space hangin' lights of course. (One must be able to multi-task when hangin' with me...ba- dump-bump!) I sure as shootin' hope so 'cause somewhere in the past few weeks, I've morphed from Crystal Gayle-land straight to resembling Cousin Itt's twin. Someone hand me a coupla zip ties...then stand back and give me room. Scooch on over Pippi Longstocking...there's some new braids in Tent City!
(Hmmm...just thinkin' of all those beautiful tents sittin' in the middle of cow pastures puts me in the mind for a good ol' fashion revival. I got me a hunch there's gonna be a whole lotta hallelujahs when that bell is rung and those gates thrown wide open!)
(Hmmm...just thinkin' of all those beautiful tents sittin' in the middle of cow pastures puts me in the mind for a good ol' fashion revival. I got me a hunch there's gonna be a whole lotta hallelujahs when that bell is rung and those gates thrown wide open!)
We've both been flat out like a lizards gettin' everything ready and man alive...it shows. We look like we've been rode hard and put up wet. We've got bruises on top of our bruises and we're totin' bags under our eyes big enough to hold enough britches for two weeks, but don't y'all worry none about us. It only hurts when we laugh and boy howdy...are we ever planning on doing a whole lotta ouchin' startin' next week!
For better or worse, the Catman and I are ready to make like a bread truck and haul...ahem...buns.
SQUIRREL ALERT!!!
Talkin' 'bout Cat Daddy, he's chompin' at the bit to get rollin' and strut his stuff, but I gotta stop and wonder. Y'all know the man's exudes pure animal magnetism...right? You've all witnessed how he's catnip to the ladies. Tell me...do y'all think Marburger Farm is ready for my hunka-hunka burnin' love?
If I know him...and oh I how do...he'll be on the prowl lookin' for new kittens to add to the litter box in his cat house. Do y'all think I should send up a warning flare...or just wait and let 'em be surprised? He's tired, but if I know him...and again, I do...he won't let a little stagger in his swagger slow him down!
Fact is, when I mentioned the VIB party at Marburger's being held in SweetT's building, the Gulf Warehouse, on opening day at 3pm, I opined one of us should stay in our booth and work. He was quick to reply it was a shame I wouldn't get to go. Really? The man is a legend in his own mind!
Ten gallon hat?
Pshaw!
Watchin' him grin like the cat who ate the canary...I'm wonderin' if cowboy hats come in ten barrel size!
But back to me...'cause I am the star of this dog and pony act...even if he doesn't realize it! Do y'all reckon I need to come with a warning label too? Y'all know I can be just a bit much every now and then...'specially if you feed me. I practically ooze muchfulness and if you make the mistake of feedin' me pimento cheese...I foam over...and at the mouth...with muchiness! Maybe a sign sayin' something like the Mouth that Roars or just simply Mighty Mouth pinned to my back would be in order?
I'm tellin' y'all...I'm excited, nervous, giddy and I cannot.wait.to.get.there to see the all the folks and get my hug on!
The only thing left to do is finish packing. I'm off to pack plenty of clean drawers, shine my rhinestones and polish up my witty repartees...'cause like Pammie's FIL always said...
If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance...baffle 'em with bull----!
Catch y'all after the bull ridin'!
(On a serious note, would y'all please go here and lift Lezlee and her partners up. They were in the process of getting a new shoppe, Elsie Mae On Market, ready when it caught fire yesterday. No one was hurt and the wonderful Mabank firemen worked quickly putting out the flames, but I know the girls are feeling a little disheartened and could use some prayers. Thank you.)
(On a serious note, would y'all please go here and lift Lezlee and her partners up. They were in the process of getting a new shoppe, Elsie Mae On Market, ready when it caught fire yesterday. No one was hurt and the wonderful Mabank firemen worked quickly putting out the flames, but I know the girls are feeling a little disheartened and could use some prayers. Thank you.)