I don't believe in coincidences.
No...as a matter of fact, I believe in God's plans and the whispers He makes to encourage those plans. That is no coincidence or lucky accident, but a full out "on purpose".
I do however believe things often come in threes, but only because sometimes it takes that many times...and then some...for us/me to sit still and listen to what God is telling us/me.
Yesterday, three things came together and yeah...it took that third time for me to finally go...Oh okay God. I see what you want of me. Forgive me for not paying attention and getting it the first time.
1. There was a game going around yesterday on Face Book where you were instructed to write X number of things about yourself that folks didn't already know. As if I hadn't thrown my dress up over my head too many times before and shown my raggedy underwear, I now had to come up with more? Oy Vey indeed...and this from a woman who loves nothing better than talking about her favorite subject...herself!
2. While I was scratching my head, trying to come up with 10 things I hadn't already told off on myself, a memory came back to me. It involved a friend of mine who years ago was on an elevator at Sears when the doors opened and a good looking man got on.
As she tried not to stare, she kept thinking she knew him from somewhere. Just as the doors opened and he started to step out...it hit her. Being a gentleman, he turned to say "Have a nice day." and all she could stammer out was "You...you are...you're...!", to which he replied with a big smile "Yes, I am."
It was Roger Staubach.
3. Then last night I was channel surfing and came across an old Johnny Carson clip with Kirk Douglas as the guest. Johnny was asking him what prompted him to write his book The Ragman's Son. Kirk...I call him Kirk 'cause we are just that close...shared a funny incident that happened while he was filming a movie. Long story short, the gist was it involved being in costume, stranded in a bar, and surrounded by gawking strangers. Finally one of the strangers walked up to him and timidly asked "Do you know who you are?" He went on to say he had been asked that same question countless time before and up until that time, he thought he did...Kirk Douglas, actor. But sometime afterwards it got him to rethink the question and decide if he really did. The book was the result of that revelation.
As I sat there in the darkness, it suddenly hit me what God was asking me.
"My child...do you know who you are?
And the truth was...No. Besides the obvious...wife, mother, child of God...I didn't have a clue.
I knew who I wanted and tried to be.
I knew who I presented myself to the world I was.
I knew who I pretended to be from time to time, but as to who I was really?
I didn't have an answer, but it was high time for me to find out.
To search my inner self, to do some deep soul searching, be honest with myself and face those things I am least proud of or happy with...this was His command to me. To either accept them or change them...that was my challenge.
As I set out on this journey of self discovery, I'll share with y'all what I dig up and out...some of it pretty...some not for the faint of heart.
Umm...note to self: Maybe not everything...'cause my mama always said not to air my dirty laundry on the front porch for everyone to see.
But those things that turn out to be life changing?
Those, you can bet your booties on, I'll shout from the rooftops...if my old self gets out of the way long enough to let my new self crawl up there.
And just for gits and shiggles, I'll leave you now with one question.
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